Whenever I hear parents at the start and end of school term worried about how tired and grouchy their children are, I think I’m relieved and pleased that so far N doesn’t show these traits. I’ve certainly lucked out with him, especially now he’s no longer waking at 5am every day, and mostly stays in his own bed. I just want to show that kids don’t always follow the usual expectations that we always hear, and that if your child is unusual (either in a good or less positive way). Children are all different.
Busting the child development myths
1, Not all children go loopy at or after birthday parties
Most parents I’ve spoken to have said that if their children get sugared up at a party (why oh why is it always greasy Haribos – bleurgh, and Fruit Shoots) it takes them ages to calm down afterwards. Some say their children won’t sleep. They’re just hyper.
Mine. Nope. I don’t think I can tell the difference. This might be because N is a bit of a stickler when it comes to eating a good spread of birthday tea. He loves chocolates and cakes, but he’ll happily chomp his way through savoury sandwiches, sausages, crisps, cucumber and pepper, before starting on any fruit pieces before getting to the biscuits and cake. So maybe the sweets and fruit shoots are just absorbed by everything else he’s eaten. I don’t know what he’s like on coca cola because he’s never had it.
2, It’s really hard to get children to talk about their day at school
Most parents moan they don’t know what goes on at school.
I count myself lucky because we’ve never had that problem. Ok, so sometimes I just have to time it right, but mostly N loves having a ‘what’s been going on in your day chat’. In previous years I’ve had to share my day before, but so far in year 2, he’s been happy to tell me everything that’s been going on. It’s my belief you just have to give the child the opportunity, wait for the right time, make it part of sharing everyone’s day, make it habit, and ask the right questions. It might take quieter children time to get used to doing it, but getting kids to talk about their day can happen quite easily.
Boys children love superheroes
Superhero parties are really popular, character toys and bedding is everywhere. And it’s really hard to find non-superhero pyjamas in some shops. Not all children like them.
N has watched precisely 1 superhero film – Spiderman. He thought it was ok, but he’s never asked to watch it again. And is quite vocal that he doesn’t like superheroes. I do worry that it could mean he’s a little left out (similarly with his dislike of football), but I’m pleased he’s happy to have an opinion that is different and to stand by it.
4, Children like fancy dress and face paints
You’d think this would be the case when you go to an event or attraction and see the queue for the face painting and the number of children running round with fancy dress or face paints on.
Not N. He does have some fancy dress costumes and I have turned up at nursery in the past to find he’s with his friends dressed up. But I can probably count the occasions in 6 years on 1 hand. As for face painting. He’s only ever once asked me when he first found the Snazaroo paints in the cupboard. He went straight in for a tiger (nothing like making it easy for my first time), seemed to like it, but has never wanted it done again.
He’ll also be one of the only children going to school on world book day or other fancy dress days, dressed in his school uniform. And he’ll be quite happy to do so. It’s a bit boring, but obviously he’s not bothered by being totally different, and he enjoys seeing what everyone else is dressed up as. And of course it makes my life easier not needing to buy or make costumes. He obviously takes after me on this one. I hate fancy dress!
5, Kids are always tired when they start school
You often hear parents finding their kids flaked out after the first day or week at school. Kids lying in, or struggling to sleep because they’re overtired. And it taking weeks for children to get settled in to school.
Nope. Not here. N has reverted back to sleeping til 6.30am rather than his old 5.10am which is good. And on occasion he might still fall asleep on a long journey in the car at weekends or on the sofa if he’s feeling a bit under the weather. But that’s more often than not in the school holidays rather than term time.
Thankfully N doesn’t seem phased by being back at school again. And it was the same the previous 2 years. He’s happy in a routine. Given the choice, he’d be happy to go out on the farm before going to school, and quite often if his dad picks him up from after school club, he’ll disappear out to help on the farm coming in around 6 or later. He’ll still go to bed the same time, and still get up at the same time. I think his body is just made to keep going a bit like a Duracell bunny.
And it’s the same with the end of terms. I don’t see a difference in behaviour, tiredness or grouchiness. He’s just N and keeps on going.
I am lucky. N’s an easy going boy and seems to be pretty level headed and evenly balanced in personality. I don’t know how that will change as he becomes a tween and teen, but hopefully we won’t see huge personality changes. But if you worry that your child isn’t like the norm and you’re wondering if he’s not doing enough or working hard enough to be tired, rest assured. Not all children do the same as everyone else.
How do your children fit into the myths about kids or not? What do they do that seems different from the majority of other children?
If all the children were the same us Mum’s would have nothing to talk about! I have two girls and they are typical chalk and cheese, makes our house an interesting place sometimes but if they were both the same it would be mundane. #sharingthebloglove
Completely agree – as a mum and teacher I can safely say all children (as with adults!) are all different – and wouldn’t it be boring to have it any other way?? #sharingthebloglove
Lovely post and so true! My daughter hates face paint, nail varnish and discos – totally different to any other 7 year old girl I know! #SharingtheBlogLove
I agree completely! Every child is unique and likes different things 100% #sharingthebloglove
I love that he doesn’t mind being different. My little girl is still only tiny but I hope she grows up to be just as happy going with what she loves and not feeling like she has to fit in. It’s no fun being ‘normal’. #sharingthebloglove
My little boy is exactly the same at parties! There’s no craziness afterwards just a route round the party bag and an early night!
We are the same in this house with all your points except the last. The first few weeks of school have caused exhaustion. But no party madness, I get told all about Ellie’s day and whilst both the girls do like princesses they also love cars. But no to superheros. Unless it is the Pj masks 😉
Ah, it’s lovely to be in the group of parents who hear about the school day. I don’t think N would be into masks either. He’s very fussy
Pingback: Sharing the Blog Love - Showcase 60 - Hot Pink Wellingtons
I don’t have this problem with parties either, Alice is always straight into the cucumber and carrot, along with the crisps and cake. Maybe the balance helps. I think as soon as you realise that all children are different and once you know your own child life becomes easier. My girls are so different and I adapt accordingly. Thank you for joining us at #SharingtheBlogLove
That’s so true. As long as we assume they all have their quirks it makes it so much easier
Thank you for writing this! Max doesn’t always fit the ‘normal’ label either – so many parents moan about how messy their children are, but Max hates mess. No mud, doesn’t like water particularly, and is generally very cautious. He’s taken until now to wear wellies as he hated the feel and yesterday he had his first splash in a puddle – I can’t tell you how amazed I was! He’s also not one for dressing up, or face paints. I’ve learned to just go with it over the years, we all have things we don’t like! Thanks for joining us at #SharingtheBlogLove
My daughter often breaks trends too! she doesn’t seem to get tired when starting a new term or finishing a term she just keeps going! Some days she will tell all about her day at school and others nothing! they are all different aren’t they x