For years I was never sure if I wanted children. I’m not a baby person at all, although I’m a big fan of well behaved, fun loving little people once they can converse and I can understand where they’re coming from. Oh yes and out of nappies.
Given we have 5 nephews and a niece, I thought that was perfect. If we didn’t have children of our own it wouldn’t matter because both our families live within a few miles of us and the children are always up at the farm visiting.
But when I got to 32 I realised I needed to make a decision one way or the other. I just wasn’t sure I wanted one because I couldn’t see myself with a baby. But I realised that if we didn’t try for a baby, when I was old I’d probably regret not having at least tried.
I also wasn’t sure when would be the right time for me, what with work, life and having to sacrifice everything I really enjoyed like dancing. But a friend said a very wise thing which is so true “it’ll never be the right time, you just have to go for it”. Now I tell other people the same thing because it really is the case.
There’s no point putting it off, babies will fit into your life if you’re prepared that things may need to change. And life will change – unless you have a husband or partner who will be an equal in looking after the baby and later child, then it will be the mother who’s life will change dramatically.
We never really had a discussion about having a baby. I just announced that I was ready to have kids and that was that. If it happened for us great, if not, we’d never regret not trying. But we were lucky, 6 months of trying (well, half heartedly, if it happened, it happened). A first pregnancy which all went well and here we are with a healthy baby boy.
I’m so glad I realised I did actually want to have a baby at some point.
How did you decide when to try for a baby? Were you both in agreement?